Yeah, I tried playing the "see how long he can stay inside of me" game.. And I lost.
I told him he can't put it there till we're exclusive. That's totally The Relationship Hole.
So we fuck and I say, "I'm about to go." He tells me, "No, leave at ten.. just lay here for a little while." When I ask, "Why?!" He gets his feelings hurt and says, "ugh. or don't." Since when did guys start acting like girls?
I love girls that fake tan. Can you say p p p p p p p p pumpkin face
you were sat in the corner crying until someone gave you a baguette, which you then tried to feed to the duck doorstop.
I regret nothing
would it be mean if I put better with the lights off on my sex playlist just for my hook up with him?
i knew as soon as i met you that i was gonna be the designated driver
I asked for my Beats earbuds back and he sent me a pic of them tied around his penis. Now I miss both my great ear buds and his great dick
The night before doing drugs with your bro is like Christmas Eve that made love to thanksgiving that made love a virgin.
Also I just took Ritalin with coffee so if anyone wants to know what numbers sound like, I got you
22 is way too old to still be having "thank god I think I'm getting my period" days
I'm gonna look back at these days one day and be like "damn I shoulda been turnt but I was in bed instead watching netflix"
Pretty sure we ruined a bachelorettes life last night
So what if you don't want to be with your family. Go drink alone and watch Netflix like a normal person, don't be productive!
My boobs smell like weed again. This happens way too often.
Randomize
