I was getting a bj with sports center on in the background
Da na na, na na naa
my tits taste like a pina colada. how often do you get to say that?
So Ive decided I have serious issues. Im walking around the school with a bag labeled booze money collecting from people while slightly hungover at 8:20 in the morning, and nobody is questioning me.
She said she didn't think she should have to shave either. Guess no shave November just became no sex November.
I know its been a few months but you must know you hve the 2nd biggest dick I've ever seen. 1st place went to a rapper so don't feel bad.
The woman exiting the men's room tried convincing me she was actually a good-looking man.
I think I have internal bruising from those poses we were doing last night. My own ribs hurt me. I don't understand.
Do you remember giving me altiods and wishing me good luck on the walk home?
I owe you 20 bucks. My blood work did show liver damage.
So the doctor told me that I am starting to showing the early signs of liver cirrhosis. Thank you Jack Daniels for making the first 26 years of my life awesome.
We had to go. She called the bartender a thundercunt.
I got stabbed with a couple of chip crumbs during sex Saturday. Further proof I need to stop eating snacks in bed
I just set my messenger to Away so I could run downstairs to masturbate. Working from home is the BEST
I think him and kristen are pretty serious now.. I dont think he cheats on her, anymore.
He answered the door stark naked. When I called him on it he shrugged and said 'casual Friday ' Some boys can't be trusted to work from home.
Randomize