Proposition. Sex. No words, no talking about it later. I just want you tonight.
they just dont make restraining orders like they used to.
you need to leave class get on facebook and start untagging IMMEDIATELY
I've decided to turn your sobriety into a reason for me to be able to drink more.
He's basically like a fancy dildo that buys me dinner.
Confession: Sometimes I wear my stolen scrubs to the corner store because people will think I'm a doctor and not just a girl too lazy to change out of her pajamas.
That's like the cock version of a mortal kombat fatality.
I came in and I guess my parents didn't hear me. My dad just said "Don't be lazy, RIDE IT." to my mom. Never coming home again.
Is it bad juju to glue mini budda to the bottom of a shot glass
you start one little fire by the lake and the police want to talk to you all night...
Well ill be drunk so just come find me. Its like where in the world is Joey San Diego
I just bought the spice girls album. We will be doing music videos in the near future. You are our baby spice-- don't fight it
I think clothing becomes optional at the second date! But you seem like a rule breaker
I started crying during a meeting at work and now I'm sitting on my couch drinking boxed wine at 1:30 in the afternoon. Fuck you too estrogen.
he said "i'm the cat whisperer, watch". he took a hit from the pipe, grabbed the cat and blew the smoke in its ear. he grinned and the cat started purring. it was magnificent
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