so explain again why im purple
no
I want to take things slow emotionally, but fast physically
Someone told me they could tell we were from cincinnati because we say "as fuck" after adjectives
Pls stop me from telling anyone else my broken blood-vessel + splint are "climax-related" injuries.
terrible decisions. terrible terrible terrible decisions.
who'd you have sex with.
omg I just had an epiphany about why I grew into such a whore....
HAVE YOU EVER NOTICED WHAT THE SPICE GIRLS USED TO WEAR?!? those were my idols, I never stood a chance
FridayRule: If it takes you longer than 5 minutes to find a parking spot, you don't have class today
I like how our relationship transcends the borders of inappropriateness and encompasses all the colors of the inappropriate rainbow.
I feel like a pizza delivery girl of vagina tho
You were fine, but your knee injury definitely came from interpretive dancing like a gay fairy with lead wings all around the Mission St BART. Everyone thought you were on drugs.
It's kind of awesome I can smoke with my parents and tell them about thetime we used listerine in that bong
Shut the fuck up. It's not the end of the world. Now come get your asshole bleached with me or we're not roommates anymore.
I can see. My condolences to your vagina.
So bottomless mimosas = me waking up in a truck bed in a random neighborhood with no purse or phone or idea how I got there.
be the chaos you wish to see in the world...
i'm trying to figure out how to respond to that in text
Randomize