who do you think you are?
someone who doesn't ask that question
I just spent an hour correcting all the grammar and spelling of all the 2pac songs on my ipod
You're boyfriend is farting in his sleep. The last one sounded like a threat.
escape the fate? dumbest band name ever. how about escape the fart. now that is a show i would go see!
I don't want to have to wonder if I'm draining my pasta in the same side of the sink you pissed in
Hey. Hope youre not too hungover. Also, did you put a Christmas tree in my guest bathroom and cover it with condoms?
I have to answer enough questions about you, I don't need your uterus tossed in the conversation.
He picked up a chick with a line about the price of used cars in Sri Lanka and developing economies. Step it up.
He took a girl home tonight that he was trying to sell a fridge to. She wanted a fridge and got his dick. He's got a talent.
You screamed "There's a potato in my anus" and proceeded to attempt to grind with the bouncer. Also, I'm pretty sure our Chem teacher was in the same bar as us.
Fighting the urge to throw up all over my little brothers jr high basketball bench. Welcome home aaron
listen. he fixes things. buys me drinks and sticks his penis in my vagina. age means nothing at this low point in my life.
He's going to be in the air guitar championships in june. Need I say more.
idk what the male equivelent of vajazzling is but it better be worth the time
it was like 6 shots in and he was automatically my type
Randomize