i fuckib htae you, you church bitch.
Does it still count as a "walk of shame" if it's only 1am?
He just asked me to come into his empty apartment after he called his parents to make sure they wouldn't come home while I was there. This is starting to look like a bad rape scene from one of those made-for-TV Lifetime movies.
does wine, beer, and vodka mix well??
dude, everything can mix, this is college.
It's okay, I climbed on the roof of the bar to get my shoe back. This may become a Saturday tradition. I'll keep you updated
The other night after we fucked we talked about Lowe's vision insurance. Never fuck a coworker.
Went to the wedding reception, and he left with ALL of the brides maids phone numbers. I don't know how he does it either.
the question is "speedos?" and the answer is "yes".
Update is I am officially king of Gettysburg. Tam and I are being threaded like royakt. In bought e ruined a drink
Just made a floating bacon boat for the hot tub. This is what America is all about.
Well sure, my hetero side is thrilled, but my gay side is soooo judging
I've spent my afternoon dipping strawberries in DayQuil if that's any indication of where I'm at in life.
I'm making a will, in it I'm leaving you my skull.
I think I’ve been affected by his dad mustache. I wanna ride it.
drunk boyfriend and drunk me are NOT meant for each other
Randomize
