Crown is evil. It plays hide and seek with my morals
If my vagina had boots, it would be shaking in them.
Ah why did you tell everyone you dragged your sac across my face!
I'm going to rise like a phoenix out of the drunken, shameful ashes that were last weekend.
Did you know they have alcohol AND weed delivery in Canada??? I'm not EVER coming home
it glows. i had to have it.
I had his cock in my mouth and he still wouldn't shut up about Star Wars.
Dude, just found out there's a monster in a video game named after me. No more dating nerds.
As soon as he came we went to Dairy Queen. That drive through lady was very condescending about our "just fucked" ice cream.
You get 5 min
Your time limits don't scare me, I'll include foreplay and redressing in that 5 min. If you wanted to challenge me you should say you got an hour, id be scared then and more creative.
I spent $31 at mcdonalds last night. Threw my nuggets all over the yard, ate them out of the snow, picked a fight about it, vomited, then passed out.
Naked.
All I remember is while we were making out M.A.A.D City came on so I pushed him off of me so I could rap along.
I sat on his face and watched Mean Girls. It was a good date.
just hooked up with a guy ON MY CAMPUS VISIT. god only knows whats gonna happen when im actually a student
She won't let me meet her hot new boy toy just because she thinks it'll lead to us having a threesome. It's not fair. I thought we were friends...
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