my head feels like I tried to put alcohol out of business last night
you were licking his little sister's watercolors and trying to paint with your tongue.
So not only just find my adoption papers that I didnt know about in my parents house, but they say "child shows some signs of mental retardation".
I am the poster child for what not to do during sex. Soon they will be calling an undesired position after me
theres a kid in a leopard robe and sunglasses filling up a gas tank. i miss college
It's so hard to find a shirt to wear out that is easily taken off, cut off my paramedics, but says "I'm a grown, respected woman"
Or I could just give you a blow job and make it up to you.
No, that's okay. Don't worry about it.
Going once.....twice.........sold to the girl who didn't really wanna do it anyway.
He's def the type to chop us into bits whilst screaming "NAPA BITCH". AKA my type
You flew out of the bedroom, stole two Solo cups from the beer pong table, put them on your feet, clicked your heels together three times
Ohh I see how it works, eat pussy and I get Reese's pieces.
I woke up in a bath tub and my face was sore and it wasn't because of you, I was impressed
I found the crust to my pizza under my covers that's cool
As a friend tho, you have the biggest dick I've ever seen
i feel like if we ever had babies together they would just be drunk all the time
I still can't believe a guy pooped in my backyard
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