the only girl from my high schools graduating class coming to our school next year went stag to prom and still has braces...
dibs.
girl! he was asleep with his back to me.he farted and i actually felt the wind blow across my leg.nice
Just got the American Express annual summary for 2009. The amount of bars we visited last year is impressive.
my facebook is like a giant collection of my one night stands
I can blatently call girls sluts here and they think i'm speaking norwegian
just credit carded her and her mom at the same time... that drunk. get on my level
We found her hiding in the bath tub.. And when i opened the curtain she replied "thank you" and walked out like nothing happened.
You ordered 6 boxes of pizza and laughed in the pizza guys face when you didn't pay for any of them.
I would have screamed and cried and bled and shit and then died. Fuck that guy.
A white limo full of drunken 30 something business people pulls up next to me and asks if they can kidnap me until 1030. If I don't make it back tonight, call someone and tell them I died gloriously
Boobs are out for the taking
Yeah I remember doing the worm in my moms room. While she's yelling at me and I'm making seagull nooises
my morning attempts to try to have sex with him was interrupted by the passion of the christ parade going on outside my house
You were in no condition to manage a 3-way.
I just tried to dye my pubic hair teal for her
Randomize
