I will give you vagina for bag of have'a corn chips.
Let's go free Charlie Sheen and party with him
He titled his birthday party on facebook, "BJ's in PJ's- an adult slumber party." I'm the only one invited.
at wine tasting. Can i cleanse my Palate with a frito?
I was ashamed to still be in my green tank this morning, but there's a guy here in full on bright green pants and a green blazer. He looks like the lucky charms guy stretched out at drunker than usual. Now, I fade into the background.
I just saw a herd of slutty loofahs run down the street...
They're basically the Kennedys. This is the family I fucked in to. I'm so proud of my vagina as much as it feels shitty for my heart.
going on a mission to find my pants and the guy who stole my beer don't wait up
You should help rebuild my confidence with your dick. Altruism: Pass it on.
You know Sunday Funday was a success when 'puke and rally' came at lunchtime on Monday.
Shriek
THERE IS A VERY SMALL CHILD YELLING OUTSIDE OF MY DOOR. THE NEXT TIME YOU TELL ME YOUR TOO BIG FOR A CONDOM I'M GOING TO PUNCH YOU IN THE DICK.
I think I've had more sex in your bed than you have and I've only been here three days
I still blew him because I won't let allergies keep me from doing what I want. But I almost suffocated like 10 times.
I'm serenading his dick with my words. I understand how poets get inspiration now.
summer in europe = liver of steel
I accept that challenge.
Randomize