We got them high and they had an hour long debate on the best way to get cum out of eyes.
you better fuck at least one or both of them.
I have the Lakers game on, but all I can think about is having sex with you. Not sure what you've done here.
At the T-Rex bar with my nephew...only in Disney can I have a beer and a soda at the bar with a 4 year old
He literally stopped in the middle of sex to look up sex positions on his iPhone...
The polish Muslims are throwin paczkis into the crowd and I'm beer 6 before 11 am
Woke up this morning in a randoms bed clutching an airplane ticket. God I hope I'm still in the country
I just sniffled when I woke up and got a bump of coke. I have never felt so good hung over.
sooo... you have no idea who nailed their tubesocks to my wall?
Your list of "good ideas" thumbtacked to the lampshade last night consisted of nothing but "tampon-pen" with a note indicating that girls could then always have something to write with, even naked.
So I found out me and this guy I was drinking beer with tonight both got lactated on by the same stripper. We're milk brothers.
Where are you? We're in between the guy dressed as a giant inflatable penis and the Justin Bieber lookalike lesbians
Does the penis have a genital wart?
My mom wants to name our new dog the same name as my fuck buddy. This will be weird
I don't want to be drunk any more. Can you hit the off switch?
My life is a random series of events connected only by bottles of Seagram's 7
That's the only way to watch Gumby. Either age 5 or high.
Randomize
