Just checked, might have creepy crawlies. What does chlamydia feel like? Not near wireless to consult webMD.
I really love her but I don't think I can go the rest of my life without anal.
you were so high that you made a 14 page PowerPoint on why Santa would beat Peter pan in a fight.
and I must say, you were very persuasive
pre-gaming in the library. just gonna keep going until i'm too drunk to keep working and then i'll be there.
After you vomited on the patrol car, you thanked the officer for helping you up off the ground. I don't think you realized you were being arrested.
This place smells like bottom shelf liquor and broken dreams
This holiday season is going to be rough between people coming home for the holidays and the already regulars on my list I might have to clone my vagina to make sure I get everyone for all they are worth
I think cutting a patient out of a owl costume is a first for those guys. It's a good story at least.
Let's go dancing. I wanna sprain an ankle. And a labia. My labia or yours. I'm not picky.
The dog just shocked himself by peeing on Christmas lights, should I have saw that coming?
If you fall asleep, my vagina and I will never forgive you.
He complimented the perfect handprints you left on each of my ass cheeks.Thanks.
So I'm trying to figure out how to talk my boss into allowing pajama day once a week. Any ideas?
I woke up in a bathtub full of green and blue Nickelodeon slime! wtf?!
Is she talking about a testicle cuff or just a cock ring? How did you meet this girl?
Is there a big difference?
It’s about the same as the difference between a night of drunken sex with a stripper at the Bellagio and being robbed and left for dead by a crystal meth tweaker
Randomize
