I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
you don't remember? you called me at 330 crying because you were in the middle of having sex with corey and forgot his name. all you kept saying was i'm a drunk bitch.
she looked me in the eyes and called me a poet because i was singing lady gaga, then she fell over...
Dude I just masturbated laying underneath my Christmas tree. Apparently all I want for Christmas is to get laid.
Apparently, I woke him up at 4AM, and yelled "you're mad because we don't have sex," while grabbing his dick. Then immediately fell back asleep, dick in hand.
..She then engaged in what she called an "interpretive pole dance"
We had sex in the tent after his 6th beer and while we were at it we had conversations with the people outside the tent.
I don't care if there's a party or not. I just want to be half naked in a cape with a never-ending supply of alcohol within arm's length at all times. Make it happen.
He sent me a picture of his dick earlier so now we can all laugh at him tomorrow
He either works for the Irish Mob or I'm being Catfished
I'm not saying you did or didn't sleep with him but he's has your thong hanging from his ceiling fan
well. can officially check "get caught having sex on the front porch by the neighbors" off the bucket list.
It's amazing the amount I can accomplish with a glass of wine in my hand.
I had sex with a boy who lives in a closet, that's like having sex with Harry Potter, right?
My moral compass kept pointing to his penis.
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