Our friend ended up naked, bleeding, requesting we throw a couch at him cause he was convinced he could block it
We did he did.
When I say naked, I mean penis exposed. Not in boxers
its easy. just sleep with a bunch of guys until one falls in love
She's doing shots in her underwear, a fur hat and mittens. I'm never coming home.
Straight up if I get stuck with her I'm going to drink myself into a prison cell.
Agreed. That's like a marriage. For better or worse, till death do us part. I will hold your head over a toilet
she asked me where ive been her entire life and the guy in the room next to us yelled "with other women bitch!"
I knew from the second he called his penis glorious that I was meant to sleep with him
Almost there.
define "almost". like I have enough time to watch a youtube video or oh shit, put on some goddamn pants because they're in the driveway.
The upside of a losing football weekend is that there are more sad frat boys willing to let loose their inner gay man.
Dude you chased a girl around the yard and then fell over the curb. Face first. You got up on your own tho so you reached champion status
I showed him my toy collection and he goes, "You won't need those anymore," and dropped his pants. I threw the House of Pleasure out last night.
It's acceptable to bring him back to my parents house and fuck on the couch right??
Reminding you of hookups your brain is trying to suppress. That's what friends are fooooooooor...
I have in my possession one ukulele shaped package.
The magnum condom fits. I feel like a manly version of cinderella
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