I hate this i feel like im wasting my youth here. I should be off hooking up with boys around the world and having awkward next morning convos in different languages!!
there's something so ridiculous to me about watching someone with glasses exercising. it's like watching a whore studying in the library. stop trying to be someone you're not.
Dude, at this rate we're going to get arrested a second time tonight.
We need to talk about our relationship.
I just won a bet involving 10 tequila shots. You've got about 3 minutes
It's official, my little sister has hooked up with more girls than I have.
I need a picture of your dick for my friends birthday card
oh wow I have been there. Hell one time Matt and I woke up naked with pizza rolls in the bed.
oh, so if i go friday and she's there, you are going to be my sponsor for not banging the crazy chick
Annnnddddd this chick is using a hand puppet made of a sock to give her research presentation...
First night sober since New Years. I'm not sure what hurts more, the hangover or the credit dread when I find out what the tickets to Bali actually cost.
I'm not even pretending to study anymore. I'm straight up sleeping in the library
Nothing kills the mood quicker than kneeing him in the face during sex
I just sent a dick pic to a number on Craigslist, this may be my new low
After we finished having sex, he drunkenly tried to hugh five me, farted, then accused me of stealing his socks.
Found her grinding on my boss with her tongue down her throat last night. Guess who just got promoted!
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