i just hope all the shady shit stops so i can let him into my pants
It's just like riding a horse. A very tall, gay horse.
Idk how hard you fucked her, but you managed to leave permanent ass prints on my tempurpedic mattress.
Just got my stitches out.. Now I can give a proper hand job
Mom called her a cunt. I think that's code for "don't bring her over ever again."
He fucks like those drill things that you see when you think of texas
Dude, get out of Andrea's vagina and call me back
I don't question myself. That's what I have you for.
I'm honored.
Dear God, please let me get my period. And if this one is fiercer than usual I completely understand.
It's pretty self explanatory. You tried to have sex on the hood of a car in front of everyone
We were both too drunk to drive home. So we did it in the coat closet and then I walked home. 20/20 hindsight: Could have both walked to my apartment and then had sex there.
I'm so happy we share a mutual love of laughing at religion.
I AM A GOOD PERSON AND THEREFORE I DESERVE QUALITY DICK!
She made me keep my boots on and say "you're welcome darlin" after every orgasm......so yes it was an awesome night.
We found you with your penis in the vacum hose crying softly...
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