i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
You can't have hate sex in a hallway!!
Which one of you FUCKERS filled the toilet with soil and planted my mothers daisys in it? NOT FUCKING HAPPY
He told me he could read braille... with his tongue. So I took him home. I don't think he was lying
I said I wanted my dignity back. He brought my thong to me after sharpie-ing "dignity" on the front. I'm not sure if I should me mad or impressed.
he asked me to have sex with him by saying 'take one for the team'. so no we didn't do it.
toilet paper cling ons are not as adorable as the little red cub makes them look on the charmin commercials.
She said she didn't want me watching her give me a bj, so she proceeded to make a "blowjob igloo" out of blankets...
Sometimes I think I have so much sex with you to be sure you're actually straight.
I HAVEN'T FUCKED ANYONE IN FOREVER AND A HALF I DON'T DESERVE TO BE A TRASHY BLONDE
Yeah. Well last night I sold my shoes to a man who I'm pretty sure has a weird foot fetish for $150 cash.
That tampon felt like a stick in my vagina, I am never making a drunken tampon choice again. Friends don't let friends choose tampons drunk.
Last night you were prentending to be a broom stick...you were laying on the floor and humming the Harry potter song.
...this is why fuck buddies should be only for grownups.
Stop making fun of my hookups!
Stop getting hookups that I can make fun of!
Randomize
