Soooo billy mays was on coke. I'm about as shocked as I was when Clay Aiken came out
the line for where the wild things are looks like radiohead had sex with an urban outfitters
He's married, a coworker, and a smoker. not sure which personal rule broken i'm most ashamed of...
after giving each other head, we had a really nice post-oral heart to heart. found out he lost his virginity in a threesome.
you left a paper here that says 'to do list' but it looks like you just wrote "drink a bunch of cough syrup and watch Who's the Boss" like 60 times
There are work activities and non work activities and dunking my head in a bucket of ice water pulling it out and shotguning a beer is certainly not a work activity
I was so drunk, I was kissing everyone. Their sexual preference was none of my concern.
He will not just "come" out of the closet. He will fall out, 69ing me, with two fingers in his starving asshole, wearing cum splattered lady gaga sunglasses, weeping.
That was the greatest thing i have ever read.
Partial kegs from last night are currently in my bathtub, which leads me to 2 questions: 1. What are you doing tonight? 2. Can I use your shower?
We did it in the bathroom in Taco Bell. We didn't buy anything before we left, which I thought was rude.
My walk of shame this morning would have been much less obvious if it hadn't been 6:30 in the morning and I wasn't walking through downtown Nashville in a Steeler jersey.
I think you just miss his friendship.
I think it's his ability to give me multiple orgasms.
She started snoring post sex, so I drunkenly walked 8 miles at 4am to go fishing. Please come pick me up
So the bar crawl I'm on is a "90s bar crawl" and I made the joke about a few overweight girls that "lack of concern for your weight is so 90s" it did not end well
You poured all their beer into ziploc baggies so it would be "better on the go"
Randomize
