chick im bringing home just asked our cab driver if she could do a line off his turban. i think im in love - or trouble.
all thats left of you is your magnum wrapper on my dresser
Hey bro u need to come home now, me and andy just had a 15 minute conversation about fig newtons. f this bong
its not that she doesnt like having sex with you, your balls just smell worst then your ass.
Just because we buy weed together doesn't mean were a couple
i told you the emergency thong was a good idea.
I wore my front clasp bra so he would have to prove his sobriety to me before we had sex.
I'm so high I feel like I'm pedaling a bicycle but I'm laying on the couch. My body might be vibrating. I made soup.
He was wearing a tux and a big sombrero so it automatically made the flute he was playing totally cool
You ran through a field yelling "I'm frolicking! I'm frolicking!" Then fell on your face. How is your nose today, doll?
I raged so hard that I was so hungover today I threw up out of a car window going 50mph cause my parents didn't pull over quick enough ...sorry to the people behind us
I'm so glad you support me having casual sex with your uncle
Dude she smelled like bar-b-que sauce. I can't think of anything better.
Drake has all the answers
His weed is so good that I don't wanna risk loosing him as my weed man so I plan to keep him in the friend zone 😂
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