My pussy is not your playground.
you freaked out because you thought your face lotion was cum in a bottle
Drinking Grey Goose on the toilet. Don't make me graduate.
he asked me to have sex with him by saying 'take one for the team'. so no we didn't do it.
Of course I'm hard in the pics. If there's a chance that these pictures will cause a scandal later in my life I at least want my dick to look it's biggest
they bet me shots that I couldn't give people piggyback rides around the club just cause I'm 125lbs and a girl...I had a line forming after the third guy.
A beer fell out of the case, hit the ground and started spraying. He's a pro. He grabbed it and shotgunned it while still holding the case.
You were telling the cab driver that you believe in him and just to follow his dreams
Hey history final, how's it feel to be raped in the ass by my steel cock of ACADEMIC PERFECTION?
you are way too vulgar to be a girl
You know you're an adult when you break 100 to get 75 cents, to buy a condom from a bar vending machine in South Boston.
No my first time having an orgasm with you will not be on face time
I just had sex in the men's bathroom of a Chinese buffet...
YOU ARE MY HERO
Starting the day with sex, coffee and productivity are what the founding fathers intended
I tried to prevent a bar fight. By convincing a guy whacked out on Molly to slap the ass of everyone who was arguing and shout "WOO" each time. I'm proud, surprised, and intrigued that it calmed everyone down so quickly...
I'm eating Arby's in the bathtub because I'm an adult and I do what I want
Randomize
