We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
Is my lip ring still in your hair?
I'm sitting next to some random guy in a gorilla suit drinking out of a bottle of vodka.
He's majoring in Religion
fun fact: in my eskimo family tree i am the only brunette
The trees feel like magic. Come fly to taco bell with me.
Three Architectural classes: $990.00 Architectural supplies: $300.00 Changing majors and using my architectural supplies to roll blunts: Priceless
I just saw a fat girl roll down the steps taking out three people with her, thought you should know.....
I should have been on a postcard. I was sitting in the middle of the forest with a plate full of pot brownies and missing you.
I was so stoned last night I got into an argument with your voicemail message.
They got mad when I cut the pizza with an x-acto knife. Oh well, more for me then.
When a guy invites you to dinner and breakfast the next day it's implied that he's going to make some sweet loving in betwixt correct?
Most of my life can be described like an HBO prison drama.
Is it okay to mention my ambition to become a supervillian and kill all humans on a first date, or is that a second date discussion?
I woke up this morning cradling my vibrator like it was a baby
I almost rear ended this hot guy driving a Porsche Cayenne just so I could get his phone number
Randomize
