she looked like the before picture.
i think i want to fuck a midget just to see how difficult it would be
Odd question. Did you find a 20 in your boxers? I need it for gas.
You just met him on Thursday, and you've already nicknamed him Golden Penis?
Just saw someone tackle someone else to the ground for their coors light; he's not getting back up.
Yea, now that Irene is hitting us stores aren't selling any alcohol; beer is now a precious commodity.
Got robbed by knifepoint. Then got sympathy Bj. I might have to walk down Austin ave drunk every weekend
I'm so confused. I feel like I just intentionally took roofies to see where I'd end up.
sometimes after I smoke and the high has gone away...the high will come back like three hours later for a brief yet gripping ride.
that's usually when I end up in someone's house, having sex with someone else, while that someone's roommate makes us mozzarella sticks.
I call BS on that! THAT WAS TOTALLY AN INTERCEPTION. JENNINGS HAD THAT.
PEOPLE ARE FLIPPING FURNITURE HERE. IN THE ROOM ABOVE ME. I HEARD SOMEONE WOOKIE CALL IN ANGER FROM SOMEWHERE IN THIS BUILDING.
I'd be lying if I said I wasn't scared, even a little.
I lost a whole day of my life. Apparemtly I was using my deodrant as a phone. And is my phone there?
I don't know how it happened. All I did was tell her I was impressed by her presentation. Her nail marks on my back ain't going away anytime soon.
Oh dear. If we're both hearing alien sounds then perhaps they're real.
He sends me pictures of his dogs and I send him my tits, it's a win win situation
Someone signed my nipple.
Let's be real, he was never going to be tall enough
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