that's the second time you've been mistaken as a prostitute. maybe life is trying to tell you something
its my fault though, i'm wearing tights
you're hiking in tights? you remind me of dennis quaid's fiance in the parent trap
Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
So i know you wont get this until you land, but if i'm late its cause i was having sex. being blunt and hope that explains things.
i licked icing off his dick. in front of his sister.
Going to rent a magician for when I eat shrooms. How has no one thought of this?
all I wanna do is swim in an Olympic sized pool of Gatorade and tylenol.
I swear to God, if you drunkenly correct my grammar one more time, I'm cutting you off.
Last time we talked he was trying to sext me but he was including pictures of fruit
I was kind of torn between "Wow, this is awkward," and "Wow, my therapist is hung."
Still breathing?
Still breathing , but quite out of it. I think I hallucinated like 20 action sequences.
What.
She thinks I'm afraid I'm gonna get caught in one of my lies and some of the girls I'm fucking will find out about each other. But it would be a relief to offload a few from the old crop and work in a few newbies into the rotation. The organization could use some new blood.
Our first kiss happened while shot gunning a hit from a gravity bong. Its that type of relationship.
I feel like it could help stop wars and begin world peace and the continents can unite for one Monday because chicken fries come back today
These last 48 hours have just been about deleting my most recent snap story
Yeah just had sex and grub hub came right after he did. I’d say it’s a win.
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