if you don't start talking to me i'm gonna tell your gf that you said she tastes bad
I'm youtube-ing children's choirs. Am I adorable? Or am I a child predator?
Predator. Straight up.
let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
I need to stop making out with boys in plain view of half my class.
He looked like Harry Potter. I had to do it.
You've ruined blow jobs for me. You were the motzart of sucking dick, where every other girl is like awkward elevator music
17 year olds will be the death of me.
He woke up screaming about pickles. I think it's gonna be a good day.
He screamed "Hug me!" and dove into the bushes. How he gets laid every weekend is beyond me.
4 months of living in europe has taught me the art of making a drunken stumble look like a dance move
I just remembered that we had an in-depth conversation about how it was too stressful to wear pants.
When you wake up, I have a unicorn coloring book, crayons, mini cupcakes, and booze.
I mean, he drove your car and it burst into flames, if anyone cant be trusted, it's him.
Incase you were wondering. Cooking naked turns into sex. Sex and cooking may lead to house fire....
That reminds me of the morning I woke up on the sidewalk covered in chicken wings
This can only be settled by a dance off.
Randomize
