He has some good qualities. Beneath the layers of asshole and fat.
I wonder what gingers are like in bed...as awkward as their hair or just as unique as it...?
Do you think most people who work at an airport Chili's can pin point where their lives went wrong?
yea, the bartender wouldn't serve you because you kept asking for "a slice of beer"
While at warped tour today a girl was crowd surfing and her vagina landed in my face, I call that a successfull day.
How did you get the entire couch up on it's side and into the bathroom?
chugging beers on the train. people are staring. I would be offended if it wasn't 8:30
Also I walked home in over mitts \nLet's take a minute to really laugh about that
The van in front of me contains people having SEX. I am in full view of a SEX VAN.
He's scared I want a relationship? How does texting him at three am and sleeping with four of my exes symbolize that?
Watched twin sisters make out thought it was amazing sick on their part but legit to watch
You've seen the quality of dick pics I normally get. The bar is high.
Last time I checked he was house sitting for his ex while she was out of town with some new dude. He was crying about how the guy told him to stay out of his whiskey while he was gone. That's whipped
He licked the buffalo sauce off my fingers and then we had the best sex of my life.
On a brighter more disgusting note...... I think I just shart myself but I'm too afraid to find out.
Randomize
