Alcoholism comes in two forms... Us.
Her mom caught her drunk streaking when she was 12. Of course she's perfect for me.
I'm currently bartering with this guy so I can fuck his bi girlfriend. We're at 5 pizzas and he gets to watch us make-out.
We made a bong out of a plastic football. I can honestly say we make a good team.
I just saw a wasted dude crawl out of the road at 2 in the afternoon. Big question- still drunk from the weekend or hitting the soju already?
Dude he fell into my wall and left an imprint then decided to have sex with the door open. Vents carry noise pretty well
I'm gonna fuck that sweet little pussy of yours into absolute submission
Wow. Sorry. As soon as I sent that I felt inappropriate. But yes. Bring a sandwich after. Lol
We've only been here for 15 hours and our names are already on 2 separate police reports. We've also been given our "final warning" by the cops and hotel management.
My parents just told me that if I stop drinking I could do something great with my life...
They obliviously haven't seen you dance on top of a pool table then
HIS DICK IS GLORIOUS AND I WANT TO RIDE IT TO VALHALLA
I think my pickup truck has been used for the sex... This doesn't sit right with me.
I just want to buy drugs without having to pay an arm and a leg for it. Is that a horrible thing to ask for?
I mean, it's not like you can exactly complain to the manager and higher ups about it.
feeding cats lunchmeat on my kitchen floor. come pour me another shot.
Would you be opposed to me keeping a live lobster in the shower for a bit?
They left me at home... I'm a liability
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