i said good morning to each one of his abs personally
I don't even want to talk about it, I'm traumatized. Even the dog knew to take advantage of the most intoxicated girl at the party...
He kept trying to order 'sex on the tennis courts' for a drink last night
when we went to bed he asked me to hold his penis so he knew i was there for him
Well, I wanted to be you for Halloween but I couldn't fit seven dicks in my mouth.
I will refer to it as the penis of glory... he fucked me for 3 and a half hours - and all he needed was a 5 minute power nap in the middle (which he took WHILE INSIDE ME). I plan on staying with him forever
Tell me about it I woke up on your couch with only my underwear on and a 26 year old wrapped around me. I thought my thirties would be different.
He tried to do the do on me last night and my exact words were "stay away from my princess parts. they're renovating."
Incase you were wondering. Cooking naked turns into sex. Sex and cooking may lead to house fire....
I GOT THE PAPER IN AT 11:58
EAT MY ENTIRE ASS COM 101
I don't have the resources to adequately explain this. I need like a Powerpoint presentation and also Vodka.
Don't forget to make sex 3rd on your calander
We kicked down a door together last night, pretty sure that qualifies us as best friends.
She's throwing a party for a guy that just got out of rehab?
I woke up on the damn lawn again...it's not even summer yet
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