No. I broke it. Note to self, never take a shower with your phone in your pocket.
Her father's a cardiologist, her mom's a lawyer...she just went from a 5 to a 10 real quick.
But i guess when you use blowjob as a verb you are entitled to some language allowances
You spent most of the night crying and throwing leftover meatballs at the neighbors dogs
Chasing shots by shotgunning beers is not a good idea.
She's clinging to me like a horny koala.
The sorority chicks were the Persian army, and we were their 300 Spartans. Can barely stand up now...such a good ratio
My bed is full of blood and feathers
I found him passed out against a dryer in the girls washroom, in front of an old woman was trying to figure out how to dry her hands.
You tried to ride his dick and fell off. Then tried to ride the floor. That's why he hasn't called back
THE AUSTRALIAN IS SINGLE AS FUCK.
My concern for you and peanut butter is the reason I am still awake.
I'm a fuck boy trapped in a single mom's body.
What happened?
Vodka. Vodka happened.
My body isnt used to all this fresh air, sun and booze....ok well maybe just the fresh air and sun...its used to the booze.
Randomize