Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
I saw a chick at 8 am this morning walking back to my dorm wearing wings... I'm kind of jealous.
i chipped my tooth tryin to cut thru her pantyhose. that stuff is bulletproof.
Dude, I couldn't come. She sounded like a goddamn dying walrus.
I lost my phone so I put sticky notes all over my roommates body asking her to wake me up at 7:00 AM.
He looked at me and said "Last call" before putting his penis away into his boxers
i would one night stand the shit outta him
so he woke up after being passed out and yelled that he had brought back moon rocks for everybody...
he may be homeless but his dick however is not... anymore.
do you know how hard it is to bring up the "what do I do if you conk out while we're fucking" conversation while maintaining the dignity of.the narcaleptic girl you just met?
We are not in a rock band. We can't continue living like this.
Think of all the island guys I could have. Ah well.
You can not bait me into a "how Stella got her groove back" call and response.
Wanna have a sleepover and take me to court in the morning?
Okay, so is being determined to have my vagina licked by a woman on Valentine's day an acceptable goal?
His mom let me come to his house for a Booty call at 4am. She even cooked us breakfast in the morning and told me im a better moaner than his girlfriend of 4yrs.
Randomize
