He was all up on my grill like I was having a BBQ. I DONT EVEN KNOW HOW TO USE A GRILL.
They're making scrambled eggs at 2 in the morning... with rum
Theres also beggin' strips and a dog bone in the corner...nooo signs of there being a dog though.
Your expertise in crazy bitches is needed.
Less talking, more tequila
Attn: you have now used your free, one time admission to pleasure town. Thank you for visiting I hope you enjoyed your trip. All future trips to P.T. Will cost you full admission price. We have different pricing plans to accommodate different situations, and remember it is more of a bartering system than a set price. Your patronage is always welcomed and once again thank you for visiting and have a fantastic evening.
Then I hope you find a set of extremely intelligent, flexible triplets in the ethnicity of your choice.
That is the nicest thing anyone has ever wished for me
I am at Brians in a pirate costume, what the hell am I thinking
When he saw my tits he said "wow you should be proud.
Hungover, threw up in a cosmetic case in my car this morning. This is real life.
So apparently there is enough alcohol to get me to agree to going to a strip club, but when I have enough they don't let me in.
Just laying in bed with my vibrator eating cold tortillas and listening to Savage Garden.
Refresh my memory....were we forced to leave or did we choose to leave?
My life is a random series of events connected only by bottles of Seagram's 7
Can we throw a "death to my 20s" party when I turn 30?
Sure. Funeral attire and hard liquor
Randomize
