You should get sea herpes
I mean sea horses
It was one of those "since we're naked anyway" type situations
He took the lighter and said "this is how I give myself a bikini wax."
what the fuck a piece of candy corn just came out of her nose
Just drive me around campus, I will be able to smell their innocence.
Stumbled into class and into a desk. When I fell my bottle broke in my backpack. I had to leave there was vodka everywhere.
I puked right in front of him after winning beer olympics and he still hooked up with me. My life is so easy.
I can coach you back to consumption. Think of it kinda like Rocky II.
You were carrying around a milk crate, randomly putting it down calling out 'praise be to the milk gods' and making people pray to it.
YOUR BALLS CAME OUT. DONT CALL ME A SHITSHOW.
I broke a glass at the bar and ended up with blood on my forehead. I apparently kept screaming BLOOD like the little boy in that YouTube video.
Send me a pic of your kids to remind me why I have morals.
I was told that I need a reference for my blow job skills. Be expecting a phone call tomorrow.
Found out the cop gives spectacular head. Don't ask. We're going out to dinner Saturday.
Ccatlin cimbing thru th sunroof plz come
Randomize
