absolutely 100% incorrect. and i love you more you silk skinned goddess
i keep walking around campus wondering if anyone is as stoned as i am
i can't wait to kiss dudes with my vampire teeth in.
I have new birth control, three bottles of jack, and some coupons for micky d's. You wanna have that sleepover?
That white girl was surprised to see orange pubes around my black cock. Happy Halloween!
I just had a threesome in the back of my mom's van. I'm pretty sure the rest of my week is going to be epic.
I'm two guys short from fucking the whole baseball team and one is gay. I will be successful by the end of this month.
I just used my VA prescription bottle of xanax to get a military discount at the liquor store. I win.
Only you could get away with that.
Currently at a fetish club with a set of swings (don't ask). Having flashbacks to the park by my house
I just bought emergency deodorant at Dominick's and put it on in front of a homeless man while waiting for the bus. He laughed and said 'girl, you a mess'. This is my life.
Yeah she let me pull the goalie and wear my USA flag like a cape since it was the first day of the world cup
That's pretty intense. There aren't many people I would pick over a burrito
He offered me my choice of the Abe Lincoln or Ben Franklin dick pic.
Even if they did assume we were doing kinky shit, it's not like they're gonna be like, "HALT SATAN! INTAKE SOME JESUS AND VOMIT YOUR SINS!"
Are these your boobs on my camera?
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