you started texting yourself and saying they were "divine messages from heaven" then you threw up on stacie's piano.
come on don't hate me. your brother looks just like you its almost a complement that i had sex with him.
I kno. She bruised her chin trying to swim thru the hardwood floor.
we've decided to start cutting you off when you can't figure out how to work an ipod.
No it's cool, He's been doing my English papers in exchange for lap dances since the eleventh grade. We're very professional.
we've had our differences but let's set them aside, go home and fuck
I GOT A VENDING MACHINE FOR OUR LIVING ROOM
I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS VDIEPO BECAUSE I AMS ENDIONG A LOKT OF EFFORT RECORIDNG IT
I ONLY PARTIALLY KNOW WHAT YOU SAID. BUT I THINK I WILL LIKE IT.
I effort
I was wasted and the time changed. I blame the male strippers.
I had to hypnotize my roommate last night so there's that.
My move is emasculating men with my superior intellect and it's not as charming when they can't see my huge rack.
Went as "Party on, Wayne." And left as, "Partied out Wayne in a foot boot with new medical bills." Fuck Halloween...and vodka.
I know right? It's like he knows how to pleasure me better than I do myself... He's like a prophet of sex
when I found u, u were using a t-shirt for pants
He sang the chorus to “Inside of you” by Russel Brand in Forgetting Sarah Marshall as he proceeded to not pull out...
Honestly? I wouldn’t even be mad, that probably took talent
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