Is it weird i consider You Sexy Thing our song?
I bet a guy could be masturbating under the table now and people would just think he was clapping along.
We just took the batteries out of the fire alarm to play the breathalyzer game. I love college.
Just used the D.E.N.N.I.S system successfully.
DRUNK CANOEING
Please text me if you survive.
LAND HO BITCH
I put the condom across her upper lip. It was like a mustache of a job well done.
It wasn't so much skinny dipping. It more like skinny walking...through a fountain.
All i'm saying is it doesn't matter how drunk you were, at 26 years of age you should always remember to take down you pants before you shit in the toilet
I have no idea. But I feel like I could climb a mountain and then have sex on it.
Do you think Brian would let me smoke while we fuck? I'm not sure ill survive exams without a constant nicotine intake
He's not messing around tonight. 4 fist pumps.
I lost my bar virginty and made out with a dwarf. It was a good night
for the record im never blowing a guy on the toilet again, that was sad and degrading
Plus he is a pilot so I could give him flight dome
If there was a gecko involved in your BDSM I'm gonna have to request that not happen when we live together ;)
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