Also, the republican called me again last night. He called me dumb and ugly then begged to come over. Gosh... he knows how to make me want him...
He looks like the kind of guy that still collects pokemon cards
Just saw an ad for "Liver-aid" how has this not become a life changing drug for millions?
What. The. Fuck. No, you will not spank me.
That wasn't intended for you, my bad.
I wonder if that one guy remembers you sticking salami to his forehead when he was passed out on new years eve.
I saw him coke blaxckout on the subway at 9 this morning yelling at people callig himself the gatekeeper.
Cock is NEVER random. You may quote me on that.
Sounds like sex on a twister board.
An idea that is both hilarious and intriguing...
Sex on acid. Try it. I thought we were fucking in outer space with fireworks inside a rocketship car. Best.
Final Summary: could he eat a lit sparkler? Probably. Could he do it while peeing off the roof? I'll tell you when you get to the ER.
Today is National Blunt Day in the Great State of Me. Come ovah
I think my pickup truck has been used for the sex... This doesn't sit right with me.
I told my mom Jesus would want me to snort drugs on his birthday
Well 1) stay calm 2) stay safe 3) drink more
Is it acceptable to bring pot to a funeral or am I going to have to do this shit sober?
Randomize
