I think about you every night.
I'm sorry.
Anything crazier than usual happen? I woke up in a stairway with my cock out.
Just talked to the girl you brought home from the bar last night while she was looking for her panties. She said to tell you "nice try".
Its official. Iv'e been kicked out of a bar in every state. I would like to take my job and travel time for allowing this to happen.
yeah, but the likliness of me finding my husband at a party where the facebook event is titled "NEW YEARS EVE SHIT SHOW" is highly unlikely
Fine then. I'll just do all this coke on my own this weekend and die. It'll be strictly your fault.
seriously. next time...underwear. I'm not spending any other holiday season wondering if it'll be my last babyless one.
And if you ever tell anyone that I have emotions ill kill you
the night was just a blur of sex and pie
Well he wouldn't kiss me so I made out with a German girl, took a shot with my boss, and I think I sprained my ankle. It was a quiet Sunday for me.
Sleeping with him wouldn't be considered hoeing out... It seems more like babysitting.
I was on top for a full on make out when in dead silence "I'm moaning Myrtle" came from the TV. Moment ruined. I got cock blocked by a fictional ghost
With my son watching me, I pulled down my pants and shit in her trash can.
Remember that guy that walked around our house naked with a boner wearing nothing but his winter coat? Well, he has a kid now.
I just took a shot before my midterm. Gotta keep things in perspective.
Randomize
