got them to do a wheelbarrow of shame down the sidewalk after the threesome. I rule
you started whispering 'the itsy bitsy spider' while you were putting your hands up my shorts.
Someone just uploaded pictures on facebook of you making out with random girls. I'm telling you because I'm assuming you don't remember anything, but the 236 pictures in the album should give you a good clue.
Operation Purity has been aborted
I can't. I can't get out. He cooked me food. And made me jager bombs. And painted a glow in the dark smilie face on my boobs
do you actually have a paper bowl full of broken glass and ecstasy or was that just a dream?
I woke up to find my purse full of puke, and all I could think was not again.
sorry like um she made me hold her puke bag while she peed in front of me is that better
At least I'm fat on the outside. You can NEVER change being fat on the inside.
That's not as bad as watching a dumb ass drunk peeing into your window fan -
The problem with having sex on the couch is that your blanket ends up in the laundry and you're left cold on the couch the next day.
she pointed to my dick and said you are going to save the world
He kept saying I needed to go to the hospital and it just made me want to call him a pussy so I went to bed
Sorry I wore your bra during sex last night
Do you think Ashley had her twin sister tag in for our date? The sex was different and I think a mole was missing
Randomize
