so pretty much your parents know your seeing a girl on the side, let her come over and just dont say anything to your girlfriend?
Stop introducing me to people as your little sister.
I don't think the lady gaga poster on your wall qualifies you as a brother.
Another Sunday, another 100 chicken nuggets
E drugging s springing. Ease dnt Kate. To t e. ess e I meant thou.
I thought it was a myth but I have just reached the age of sitting on my balls. Not a fan.
Basically, what i'm trying to say is, if you don't have something, excuse or gift, to satisfy my anger i am going to look you in the eye and piss on the floor.
A little sexual choking never killed anyone. And if it did, they died happy.
Drunk yet?
Well I just did the worm on an empty dance floor while the bridesmaids were serving cake. You tell me.
The highlight was when a stranger was nose to nose with you threatening to kick ur ass, and you said "Is that your real face? Stopped him dead.
Are you 5:30 blackout again?
I don't care. She's the only girl to make me feel like my face is melting when she blows me.
I guess what I'm trying to get to is that my dog sneezed on my dick earlier and its really taken the joy out of my evening.
Just keep me informed about your plans. That way i can figure out places to go and if i need to shave my balls
Woke up with a grilled cheese in my hand, it was like god giving me a high five for the night before
I woke up next to him with nothing on and my thong around his neck. I just put my clothes on and left, but he still has my thong.
Randomize
