Spring semester is just not the same w/o you
I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
he woke me up at 3 am to ask me where my plunger, a towel, and staples were. i'm afraid to go into my bathroom.
I've officially moved beyond college drinking. I just got business drunk at an internship seminar.
She was wearing a "Got Beer" hat and your bed had necco wafers all over it the next morning. Another story for the grandkids.
Beware of calls from Dad. I just had a longer than I would care to admit convo about the ididarod. Apparently it starts tomorrow.
i wasn't going to tell her about the threesome but i had to explain the tree and the green paint everywhere
Which is worse rug burn on your nipples or laying there after wondering how long you have to cuddle before you can sneak away?
I'm ordering a large vanilla ice cream with rainbow sprinkles so when I vom tonight it will look like lisa frank dolphins in acid trip colors
You were so drunk last night you thought you force pushed the automatic door open.
We had sex and he ended up in the hospital... don't know if I should be worried or proud.
We stopped mid-sex and both shotgunned a beer then got back to it. Is this what love feels like?
What is more embarrassing, shitting yourself in Mexico or having sex in a forest preserve with a 19 yr old? This is crucial research.
It's situations like these that make me climb out of windows
He apologized for cumming on my leg, but not for ghosting me for 3 weeks before :(
Randomize