Why did you take off so early
No more beer. And also. Threesome. Maybe. Ill let you know.
I hope im prettier
yea, just so you know this whole self-loathing thing is getting pretty fucking annoying
Just found my car keys in your throw-up.
And whoever invented the condom should be put to death.
I asked for a dramatic "funeral" look for my makeup. They judged me.
This is how I ended up being the slutty friend isn't it?
and if my full six pack comes in by Halloween there is no stopping the man slut costume. I have no shame
This girl just texted me asking me to drop her cheese. What the fuck for that mean?
Rainbow fish was a wild success, got wasted at 6 gave away most my scales and made out with max from where the wild things are.You'd be so proud
My boyfriend sold my favorite shoes right off my fucking feet last night outside the bar. It might have played a part in our breakup today.
Then I did coke with my taxi driver where he then ended up paying me for the drive. You should try being a girl sometime it's super sick.
I mean, he drove your car and it burst into flames, if anyone cant be trusted, it's him.
so... i have a picture of you and three other girls making kissy faces at this giant stuffed banana you're holding. however, you seem to be violently screaming at it.
Those bitches did NOT have my back.
The last time I saw you, you were giving the stripper a lap dance.
last night is slowly putting itself back together. Its one giant slutty puzzle, all the pieces are covered in tequila and shame.
Randomize
