We're pre-gaming then going to chuck e cheese's.
If you're joking I'm going to be sad
She was hit by a car at 47 mph and lived. That explains everything.
Yeah he had his two razors labeled "face" and "pubes". Should I be disgusted or impressed?
So he thinks I sent him a picture of my boob last night, but it was really just a close up of my arm.
I just dropped off shoes at Mike's hotel. The chick he hooked up with last night stole his phone and shoes.
The highlight of my night was definitely explaining the bandaid on my nipple.
Is it cheating if its a threesome? This is more like a party game than infidelity.
Found my bike today. On top of the garage. I'm not even going to ask myself why.
Well I took a spicy wing shit in a field this morning.
Seriously insulted!! You can not share my dick pick with your gay brother. He won't quit poking me on fb
come over. We can flirt with the criteria for substance abuse and talk about our daddy issues
is there a line between daddy kink and oedipus complex?
I'm taking a shower and i'm gonna bring my pocketknife with me
I'm not sure. I have to find the Greeks I was with last night and see if they can explain to me why I can't hear out of my right ear and why I look like I got the shit kicked out of me
Can we just take a minute to acknowledge that you're drinking with your gay ex boyfriend's DAD who is a DEACON??
Randomize
