omg he said he wants to insert his penis into my vagnia what do i say
tell him to stop quoting family guy
It was like my butthole was peeing. Felt comforting yet not fulfilling.
Fuck that. Livers are so overdramatic and attention hungry.
so when I got there he was dressed as jesus in a recliner drinking whiskey out of the bottle watching spanish porn. Then kept shouting dont judge me or ill judge you. we didn't even go to a halloween party.
i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
Like lay upon bear skin rugs, drink brandy and reminisce of the yesteryear's before a majestic fire place? Because those are my plans.
BECAUSE THIS IS AMERICA AND DONUTS AND TITTIES AND ALCOHOL IS WHAT THIS COUNTRY WAS FOUNDED ON
You told the cop you where the star of the Track team and tried to run away. So yeah, i'm not surprised.
Nice. The Governor's son bruised my vagina.
That's going to be the title of my memoir.
I found my grandmother's vibrator, how was your day?
I'll just tell you, some how when we were having sex on Friday my collarbone got fractured.
you never un-have a 4some
the good news is I finally used my captain america waffle maker to make captain america waffles
can we fuck so we can live up to our nicknames for eachother?
I should probably apologize for licking you last night since you drove me home, but I stand by my decision
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