I told him it tasted like his mom..needless to say we were asked to leave.
oh well we may not be friends on facebook but at least i got laid
i went through the entire semester and only just now realized there's a girl in my history class that i've hooked up with.
I got to the point where it seemed like she had 8 giant breasts instead of just two
The vagina on Hilton Head is mighty fine this time of year.
Thanks for alerting everyone in our apartment what your one night stand's name is. Could you scream a little louder?
I just peed in a flower pot on the veranda while crying and holding a drink
You were being mean. And telling everyone to suck your six inch strap on. People were not pleased
Please be lying.
Im not. Your family was creeped out
This guy keeps going off in the metal detector. When is it appropriate for me to punch him in the throat just in case?
Just got our of the shower. I'm standing naked in front of my open windows cause fuck my neighbors that's why
In other news, I just burned my penis
She asked how comfortable I was with her while we were in the shower. She then proceeded to pee in said shower.
He dated a girl who could do the damn splits on his dick like how do you compete with that
I'm just gonna ride this ego train to sex town
No one can explain why there is Dora the Explorer shampoo in my shower...
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