return my video game
i permit you to call me
rhymes with "ouble enetration"
u know u need to get laid when watching mike wazowskis gf from monsters inc makes u horny
I woke up wearing nothing but his lifeguard whistle..
there was so much ham clogging the tub drain.. he said it was ok he has a cleaning lady
He was banging holes in the kitchen wall with pots. They tried to pull him away but only managed to pants him. He kept "drumming".
Important update! My next door neighbours have a canoe. Repeat: THEY HAVE A CANOE! We are having sex in it before this summer is over.
Only you would have to block the fucking governor of Tennessee from reading your tweets
Whenever you're sad about your life, just remember that I'm on a first name basis with the late night taco bell drive-thru workers.
And then I was like pick your blow job song and he choose the sonic the hedgehog theme song. If he's not the one no one is.
I woke up with my my shoes on and pants half way off and missing 60 dollars. Please please please tell me you saw me last night.
andy told me i got kicked out of the bar and was so drunk i forgot and got back in line. the bouncer was zero impressed
you have 30 seconds to convince me not to grab this guy's crotch in front of his girlfriend
Why are there naked heterosexuals in my apartment?
Randomize
