i found her turbo button.....if you know what i mean.
He tried to pick up a girl by telling her about his homosexual experience in high school.
I cannot remember December 31 for the past 3 years. it might as well not even exist on my calendar anymore
Do what your heart wants. . .
My heart wants to rip his balls off and tie therm to his head using his penis
If 26 stitches didn't sober her up, nothing will.
her dad gauges his nipple piercings.
I only had sex with him so I could try to steal his roommate's cat, what kind of girl do you think I am?
We got the DJ into it too! "If there are any dudes into other dudes out there, my man mark is looking to get pounded. Buy him a drink stat!"
You told us that you don't have to wait in line at Taco Bell. Then, drove up to the window and grabbed someone else's food.
Yea we had fun. Lost my wallet some girl has it. Sarah fell asleep in a cab and ended up at some wawa. It was cray. She's home now
I woke up half naked on the floor next to his bed, and his cat was staring at me like it had seen everything that i myself don't remember..
FUCK and YOU. times 10. To infinity and beyond. You bastard. Worst. Cockblock. Ever. I'm going to nail your sister.
You said "I'm not gonna waste my last condom on you" last night.
WHAT THE FUCK HAPPENED. WHO CAME HOME WITH ME. WHAT THE FUCK RESPOND ASAP I AM SO CONFUSED
I accidentally just texted my dad asking if he wants to do shrooms with me. Do I leave the city now or...
Randomize