Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
This is why I shouldn't be left alone with liquor and anticipation.
How does me getting a new dildo make you crave olive garden
Cuz last time you told me I was going to be shocked about something you got a hand job from a stripper in canada
oh, i've got big weekend plans. on an unrelated note, do you think viagra will work if the guy is roofied?
BEST FEELING EVER: Standing in a hot fucking shower, while super baked, while eating a cookie.
You eat cookies in the shower?
ok it turns out chain mail does not protect against falling down a flight of stairs. please send help.
We didn't want to make a pit stop so I just helped my husband pee in a bottle. No one told me this was part of love.
He asked me to hum the Ghost Busters theme song as I was going down on him
I really want to fuck that guy in the full wind breaker suit
Yes, if by 'finishing my business' you mean vomiting in her bathtub and losing my watch.
Woke up this morning with Nerf Bullets stuck to everything in my house and nut in my belly button. What exactly happened last night?
If that orgasm indicates how the rest of the year is going to go, I need to buy rain boots.
Help me help you realize you are a moron
I've faked every orgasm I've ever had, I think I can fake being sick for 8 hours.
Randomize