420 ftw
there's a booger on my laptop, i suspect it's yours
Remember that dream I told you about where I shit out my own skeleton? I had it again last night.
I think its a sure sign I need to get laid when every cloud in the sky looks like a penis.
I really need to stop carrying a flask around with me in my backpack at school..
Aren't you in 8th grade?
9th, but that's not the point.
omg my older sister has been googling "how do I know if I've had an orgasm?" and "bj tips". the family laptop is not meant for this...
He's pole dancing on a heat lamp.
We're having the conversation about what happened last night, all we can come up with is that we came home, drank two litres of lemonade, I took one of her seizure pills and we fell asleep with sabrina the teenage witch on
I cleaned out the fridge, had to pound the brews. I am going to be wrecked for my final at 1
Need you on the dancefloor. Hungry and lonely.
So when the drug raid cops tell you, you should get out of the relationship, it probably means its time.
My parents heard us going at it in their tent. I told my mom it must have been a bear looking for food. I don't think she bought it. She deliberately chose this park because bears haven't been sighted here in years.
I watched you down those shots like a lion cub watching its mother rip apart a gazelle
I just scored a new eye doctor and a date all in one email. BOOM!
I almost got decked by a guy who looked like Mr. Clean. How was your night?
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