i hate sounding clingy, but i just wanted to verify i wasn't an asshole in your mind
dude they were twins that means they were both only 17
jess passed out on the pong table. it was depressing until we started singing shania twain an hour later and heard her muffled voice singing along.
we went to sleep in different beds and woke up spooning. alcohol truly is the anti-cockblocker.
I understand why you refuse to be sober now
She went into the basement and sang to my cat for three hours....she actually has a beautiful voice....
I would totes be making out with random people in the name of america if I was at the white house right now
Hiding the dark circles under my eyes this morning was like trying to hide a Beached Whale on the Couch eating Pita chips.
He's getting me an energy drink and said good morning beautiful. He must sense i'm cutting him off from the sex.
he stopped talking to me, quit his job, moved out of the province and then told me it was "no big" when I called him apologizing...
Of course I have a pirate flag
WHERE THE FUCK AM I? AND WHO PUT DUCK TAPE ON MY NIPPLES! MY NIPPLES!!!!!!
Wait til you see what we did to Dave. Hairy bastard will never be the same
A girl in McDonalds just asked if I was in here wasted a few nights ago throwing fries at the staff, I said it was my twin
We both know that wasn't me
Dick is dick
Look decision making is not my specialty
Which is why I just spent $33 on a breakfast sandwich coffee and hash browns
Soooo, hypothetically, how long would roommates have to sleep together before its considered dating...
Randomize
