yeah but I shoulda known it\'d be bad when he start rubbing my pubic bone instead of the clit! Awkkkkwarddd
what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
I'm out of vodka and money. My semester is officially over. The way I see it, my finals are just forms I need to fill out in order to leave campus.
This girl just stopped in the middle of a sentence because of my blue eyes. She said she got lost in them. I am laying pipe tonight.
her sex was completely horrible but her weed was great. imma ask her out again
who am I kidding I don't have any dignity. Plus we're not doing a porno, we're just doing random things naked
What ever happened to the whole 'innocent until proven guilty' thing. Like 'not pregnant until proven pregnant'. That's how it should be...
Well the streets were closed, so it was okay for me to just lay down for a little bit.
I told him I liked how shrimp feels in my mouth, but I don't actually like eating it. Turned out to be the most awkward way to say that I wanted to suck his dick.
We poured some Korbel out for our homie Dick Clark.
Remember that mom/daughter stripper team? Well i just met the ex husband/father in AA. WOW!!!! WOW....
Came home to my roommate drinking a 40 in the shower. Chugging with his hair still fully shampoo'd.
Remember when we tried to have fun last time..? I got put in a choke hold and you woke up in some ones car.
I walk into the pharmacy and I'm like "I need three morning after pills" and the guy was like "uhhhh". All I said was "we didn't plan it, we all just got laid the same night"
you asked if you could borrow my vagina for the night
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