what happens if a cat eats a birth control pill? i mean i don't care about the cat i really just don't want to get pregnant
TLC. RIGHT NOW. PRIMORDIAL TODDLERS.
My insides feel lik shag carpet. It is awesome
You said you wanted to go to louisiana and get arrested by Steven segal
Does Vicodin go better with white or red wine?
Only I could do what I did last night and feel perfectly ok working around children the next day
I knew it was gonna be a rough night when the guys next to us at Relay for Life started shot gunning beers and yelling "This ones for all the hot chicks that went bald because of cancer". It kinda went downhill from there....
Typical Sunday afternoon purchase of condoms and a helium tank.
Got him to take a shot from the drip pan on the George Forman. He's gone now.
I would sacrifice a finger for two more hours of sleep.
Pretend you're in a taco. That always helps me sleep.
Eric was just sitting there open-mouthed swallowing sake from that squirt bottle for so long the lady across from us leaned over to her kid and told him not to end up like "the big alcoholic one"
I'm over being sad. I'm now onto thinking about all the ways in which he is a total fuckwaste
Failing this, see a doctor for elephant tranquillisers, to be taken with whiskey orally, twice at dawn.
Okay she just told me to turn the volume down on the fan. What does this even mean?
Randomize
