Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
his pick up line was "wanna get a pizza and fuck?"
did it work
that's not the point...
how many days can you live off of Vicodin and frosty?? im going on 4 days......
When I told her that her boyfriend was making out with another chick, all she said was "which one"
I really thought you were going to tell me you were pregnant on facebook chat. FACEBOOK CHAT. I almost cried.
She bellyflopped onto the poolside bar, broke one wine bottle, and stole another...the resort staff just frowned and cleaned up her mess.
Bartender just fed me brownie. Its going to be a good night
I can't believe you're asking me to think of a sincere, creative way to apologize to your penis at 2 am.
Kid got laid mid-party wearin a fuzzy hat with ears and 40's taped to his bear paws... wtf
If I wear a tail on Halloween, how am I supposed to grind? Maybe I will just wear devil horns
holy shit the woman im hooking up with is closer to my moms age than my own
Just scratched my head and I basically rained glitter.
You do realize he's just an extension of his penis, right?
its times like this i wish i didnt have a penis
Tanner. All u drink. 10 bckaa. Locked in Porto potty outside. Constructed area. Main strrrreeeett. Fuck. Help. Pleese
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